A PowerPhrase A Week From SpeakStrong Inc

I Need Your Input on Teleseminar and Article Topics
I created a preliminary list of upcoming telephone seminar and article topics that I would like your input on. What do you need help with? Please review the lists and tell me what interests you - and what topics I omitted.
Article Topics: http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/category/article-topics/
Telephone Seminar Topics:
http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/category/telephone-seminars/
Please respond by emailing me or posting a comment on my blog. Thanks.

I have six new articles for you this week.
The list of all available articles is at: http://www.speakstrong.com/articles

New articles:
1. How to Use Reflective Listening Scripts for Clarity and Understanding
2. How to Write Strong Subject Lines in Your Emails
3. How to Ask for Equipment at Work
4. How to Delegate Work Effectively
5. How Joel Told His Boss He Was Wrong
6. How to Handle Interruptions at Work

This Week in the World
It's a Gender Thing

Over the years I’ve noticed quite a difference in styles between the four female assistants I‘ve had and the three male assistants. The women all took care of me personally as well as professionally. The men? Not so much. This was illustrated to me last week when I sent articles to post to my male assistant in HTML rather than as a Word doc. I expected him to be pleased that I had done that, but his response was: “This article is black and completely unpostable.” Period. End of sentence.

There was nothing wrong with his remark, but I assure you, the women on my team would have replied much differently. They would have said things to make sure I didn’t feel bad that I sent them something that wasn’t perfect. They might even have apologized to me for not being able to post it as it was. They would have attended to the relationship while responding to the situation.

There are benefits and liabilities with both styles. Sometimes the take-care-of-the-relationship approach seems warmly satisfying, sometimes it seems unnecessarily tedious. Sometimes the just-the-facts approach seems exhilaratingly efficient, sometimes it feels starkly cold. The main challenge on the receiving end is to acknowledge the difference. Occasionally I remind myself that my assistant is a guy and resist my temptation to decipher hidden meaning that doesn’t exist.

If you don’t know which style is more likely to fall on receptive ears, I recommend adding a brief experiential or personal comment that is intended to create connection. Brief is key here. A simple – “We’re getting there.” Or: “That should do it” can keep the straight facts from feeling like a bucket of cold water to the relationally-oriented without losing credibility with the low-touch types.

To post a comment in my blog, click here, scroll down to comments, click and post.

PowerPhrase of the Week
Recycled Packaging

To keep my shipping charges down and reduce waste, when I fill book orders I like to reuse packaging from my own purchases. It makes sense to me, but someone who receives an order from SpeakStrong in an Amazon box might not understand my logic. The answer came on a package I received from author Tom Antion – bearing a sticker that said
- We use recycled packaging.

That simple framing turned a potential liability – a used box – into a plus - recycling.

My orders now go out with a recycling sticker.

comment

Be your own advocate. PowerPhrases: The Perfect Words to Say it Right and Get the Results You Want tells you how.

Poison Phrase of the Week
It's Easy

When someone is struggling with understanding something, the last thing they want to hear is,

- It's easy.

That can be heard as: "It's easy and you're stupid if you don't agree."

Learn more about word choice in How to Use PowerPhrases.

comment

Ask Meryl
"Like"

My daughter uses the word “like” continually. She uses it all the time...especially when trying to tell stories. Example: "He was like blah, blah, blah and then she was like yadda yadda yadda." She knows it sounds weak and she wants advice on how to stop this bad habit. I would greatly appreciate any assistance you could provide.

Meryl Responds

There are two great ways to change this kind of habit. One is to deliberately overuse it. When she’s like with someone she can like tell what she’s like doing, she can like use like every like chance you get. If she does this, she can stretch it out, exaggerate it, say it as if she’s a kid smacking gum, as if she’s a drill sergeant barking orders, as if she’s a grandmother telling tales of old. You could even overuse it with her too, and compete for who can use it the most.

Another approach is to have someone count how many times she uses it. That’s how the Toastmaster’s club breaks people of using ums and ahs. They have someone count, and it works well. It makes you self-conscious for a while, but then you stop.

Whatever approach she chooses, tell her to have fun with it. The more playful she is, the quicker it will change.

comments

Reader Success Story
No Story this Week

comment

Reader Comments on Previous Newsletters

Click and scroll down for the latest posts.

I'll Let You Take Care of This

Issue 271
May 24, 2007

www.speakstrong.com

You are receiving this by request.
To subscribe click here.
To remove your name click here.
I Said It Strong Medal
Send in your success stories and receive a free Pippi Giraffe SpeakStrong Award.