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A new kind of power
Life is all about power, right? It's about who has the marbles, how they play their marbles and how you can get their marbles from them…
Well, there’s a new kind of power in town, and it’s a kind of power that can easily be overlooked. I’m always delighted when I find someone who successfully wields this new power. It’s the power of giving people something of value and followed by an invitation to take an action you want them to take.
I had the joy recently of having three readers take my suggestions to give something of value to people they had impasses with…and each found that their concessions opened doors to counter concessions that held far more value than what they had given.
It works in business, too. Whenever I send out a free newsletter, I see my orders climb.
I was blessed last week to consult with David Meerman Scott, a marketing strategist who used this approach to launch a best-selling book. He gave away a free eBook, and had 42,810 downloads within 20 days of posting.
There are times when power means setting boundaries and standing by them. But the new kind of power - collaborative power - is showing its strength in unexpected ways.
There’s a benefit to you in my recommitment to the “give something of value” approach. I’m creating some pretty fun freebies for my new eBook, Unite and Concur. Stay tuned.
Oh, yes, be sure to read the reader comment on last newsletter's "Love lessons from a cat."
This Week in the World comment
"A friend hears the song in my heart and sings it to me when my memory fails"
PowerPhrase of the Week
I think of something you said
One of the most generous gifts we can offer someone is to let allow them to have an impact on us. And one great way to let them know that they have, is to quote their wisdom back to themselves or remind them of something brilliant they said. Like when Joe said to Tracey,
- I was going to cut corners on this one, but then I thought of something you said about doing the job right the first time…
It doesn’t take much to let people know how they’ve added to your life, and it bring enormous results.
Poison Phrase of the Week
Business P-i-m-p-
Language expert Laura Orsini posted an article about a speaker who branded herself as a:
- Business P-i-m-p
You can read her entire post here.
My comment is: there are some ideas we don’t want to feed - even if they’re memorable or potentially profitable. I’d put the concept of “pimp”in that category. Reporter David Schuster was rightfully suspended from his job for suggesting the Clintons were “p-i-m-ping” their daughter by having her work for the campaign. I'm sure he's rethought his word choice. I would hope this speaker will rethink her brand.
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Read the in-depth description of: |
Meryl,
When one of my associates quit, I covered her responsibilities while they tried to hire someone new. They hired someone incompetent and I’m still doing both jobs.
I said, “I’m only one person here. I can’t do everything.”
What should I have said - and can I say now?
Meryl Responds:
Frame your comments in terms of mutual interests.
Say:
- I was happy to pitch in and do whatever it takes to keep things going while the position was empty, but the level of overtime I’ve been putting in isn’t sustainable. I’m exhausted, and the quality of my work will slip if I continue to work two jobs. I understand the work needs to be done, so let’s sit down and figure out how that can happen in a way that doesn’t compromise the work and is sustainable.
Basically it’s about you setting boundaries. It’s a risk to set boundaries, but the more you risk, the more you stand to gain. I suspect they won’t risk losing you if you set sustainable boundaries. Just make it clear that you’re working toward everyone’s interests when you set them.
Do you have a communication question? You can Ask Meryl.
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There's lots of information about how to communicate |
Reader Success Story
Making the work manageable
(Yes, this is the follow up from the previous question,
rewritten to protect the identity of the heroic.)
I was overwhelmed from doing two jobs. I sat down and tried to
figure out how I could make it manageable, so I could talk to my manager
about it in a way where I seemed like the solution to the problem instead
of the problem. I was surprised to realize how many resources I had that I
hadn’t considered.
I went in and told them that the long hours and extra work load was going to create a problem. I would be over-tired and I was worried that trying to handle the extra duties and my job would mean I would rush through both and would end up not being the detailed and organized person they expect me to be.
I went on to recommend how some of my workload could be redistributed to different employees. I received a huge thank-you from the President of the company in front of the whole team. And everyone was happy to pitch in. They saw the added responsibilities as career opportunities.
Reader Comments on Previous Newsletters
Blog comments:
A chance to love unconditionally
When words don't match the tone
Silent treatment from the boss
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Issue
301
February 27th, 2008 |
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We will respond with our best suggestions. We may publish your question and response anonymously unless you request that we only respond privately. We appreciate your feedback on our response. If we publish your question, be sure to check Meryl's Blog for further suggestions from our readers.
SpeakStrong Definition
To express yourself both powerfully &
effectively;
to say what you mean,
mean what you say,
without being mean
when you say it.