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Welcome new subscribers
A special welcome to my new Food Service, Meeting Professional and University Women subscribers. I had a wonderful time in DC, Nashville and Omaha. What a treat to meet so many fabulous professionals.
Termination revelation
The blog is full of insightful new posts regarding the word "termination." I had a useful realization. One big problem with the word "termination" is that we apply the word to the employee, not to the employment. It's a subtle but powerful distinction.
If you believe words matter, you'll appreciate the implications of terminating someone.
Be sure to review reader suggestions and comments here and here.
Feeding what you want
In PowerPhrases and on my website, I talk about the importance of “feeding” your higher nature and “starving” your lower nature. We all fall into small-mindedness at times, but the important question isn’t whether we ever think and feel negative, but what we do about it when we do.
In my recent travels, I met a lot of people who feed their higher nature, and one stands out in particular. But before I tell you about him, I’ll tell you about a couple of people I met who fed negativity.
One complained at an airport gate that we were boarding late, even though we had a light load and were able to leave on time. Another got on the phone when we landed to complain to someone about how Delta was always late and he would probably miss his connection. I looked at my watch, and noticed we were 8 minutes early.
I found it interesting that these people felt a need to feed misery over nothing. I found it inspiring that after I arrived at my destination, I met someone who fed joy. I took a cab with an African immigrant driver. What a contrast. This man (once prodded) told me the tale of how he had left his country when he was 16 due to civil war. He had no idea whether the rest of his family was dead or alive. My joyful driver found nothing to complain about, and plenty to be grateful for.
Listen to people this week to notice if they feed their higher nature or their lower nature. And in particular, pay attention to what your thoughts and words feed.
This Week in the World comment
“Imagination is better than knowledge"
Einstein
PowerPhrase of the Week
I've got some interesting ideas to share at the meeting
TV shows and newscasts use teasers – short introductions to upcoming segments to create anticipation. I used a teaser in my opening section. So why not use teasers for other areas of life? Why not create anticipation for that meal you’re creating, that date you and your spouse planned or a gathering you’re looking forward to? If you do, by the time the event happens, people will be primed to enjoy it.
You can even use teasers for meetings. For example, say,
- I’ve got a lot to tell you at the meeting.
- I’m looking forward to us catching up on events at the meeting tomorrow.
- I’ve been preparing for our meeting tomorrow and I’m looking forward to it.
Do that, and see if it doesn’t make for a more interesting meeting.
It certainly works for dates.
Unite and Concur tells you how to reach agreement on contentious issues. It's not just for political discussions, it can guide you through all your challenging conversations. Stop arguing and start communicating now.
Poison Phrase of the Week
Pain killer
The recent discussion about the word “termination” for ending employment heightened my sensitivity to militant terminology in our every day language. Which is why I heard the term “pain killer” with new ears today. The expression suggests aggression, but in fact, most “pain killers” are really pain blockers, and the best ones treat the pain by treating the source of pain.
If you consider pain to be a warning sign, the term “pain killer” could be analogous to “smoke-alarm destroyer.”
Does the term “pain killer” reflect our culture tendency toward aggression over working to resolve the source of our problems? I think it does.
(There were a lot of comments on the word termination. Be sure to check them out.) (More here.)
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Read the in-depth description of: |
Meryl,
What can I say to a co-worker (management) whose normal response to inquiries is to begin by saying “how terribly busy she is”?
Meryl says,
Say:
- When you tell me how terribly busy you are, it signals to me that I am imposing on you by making an inquiry. Is that your intent?
I do try to avoid unnecessary interruptions; however, I’d like to feel free to ask for things I need without getting the impression that I am imposing on you.
Do you have a communication question? You can Ask Meryl.
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There's lots of information about how to communicate |
Reader Success Story
No story this week - but new posts on Unite and Concur
Read previous posts here.
Reader Comments on Previous Newsletters
Blog comments:
Poison Phrase Pet Peeve (scroll down)
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Issue
307
April 30, 2008 |
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Ask Meryl
We will respond with our best suggestions. We may publish your question and response anonymously unless you request that we only respond privately. We appreciate your feedback on our response. If we publish your question, be sure to check Meryl's Blog for further suggestions from our readers.
SpeakStrong Definition
To express yourself both powerfully &
effectively;
to say what you mean,
mean what you say,
without being mean
when you say it.