Meryl Runion, CSP is a speaker, trainer, and author. Learn more.
This Week in the World
Twitter, emotional awareness and skill, new article
I’m a newbie on Twitter. That’s a social networking site that gives you 140 characters to answer the question: “what are you doing” throughout the day. It has me thinking in sound-bytes.
If I invented a social media site, I’d include the questions, “What are you feeling?” and “What are you thinking?” Why? Because we could use the practice.
In my communication seminars, I ask people to formulate phrases starting with “I think,” “I feel,” and “I want." It’s amazing how often people flunk the feeling part. Even my amazing group of counselors last week confused thought and feeling.
Perhaps if our social media strategy included emotional disclosure, we’d develop the emotional awareness and communication skill to handle life’s challenges.
For example, an acquaintance with aggressive breast cancer has an eerie detachment from her situation. She says she refuses to go into fear – implying the only alternative to fear is no feeling at all. Her detachment seems to be as big of an obstacle to decisive action as fear was in the people I lost to cancer.
Emotions exist to give you pleasure when things are good, to motivate you when they’re not, and to let you connect authentically with others. Why would you want to short-circuit that?
You have an amazing range of feelings. Develop your EQ – your Emotional Intelligence.
Visit my articles and search emotions and tears – I have several useful articles there. And to really develop your EQ, get SpeakStrong.
Quick. What are you thinking, feeling, and doing?
Coming soon to a website near you. Stay tuned…I have a fabulous SpeakStrong pictorial guide in the works.
New article: Secrets to Speaking Strong in Customer Care
A triple team approach to communication mastery
Speak strong, smart, and sweet
""If you're smart, you don't have to be so tough."
~ Meryl Runion
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PowerPhrase of the Week
Your cancer won’t wait
My acquaintance’s health practitioner told her,
• If you wait to decide how to deal with your cancer, be aware that your cancer isn’t waiting.
Great counselors present options. They clearly state the likely impact of client choices without telling clients what to do. My group last week was concerned about coming on too strong. It’s good to be strong when the stakes are high. Just avoid making their decision your decision.
Speak Strong is the next step after PowerPhrases!
Poison Phrase of the Week
Under new management
Randy was surprised to be charged shipping on his large order. In the past, orders over $100 came with free shipping. There was no mention of the charge when he placed his order. When he asked about it, the explanation was that the company was
- Under new management.
Yeah, he thought. Under bad new management.
Customers need to be informed of changes. When those changes cause glitches, instead of hiding behind management excuses, companies need to honor reasonable customer expectations.
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Read about my new book release: It's the next step. |
Reader question
Usurping my authority
Meryl,
My boss will come in and tell my staff they can have the day off, which leaves me scrambling to get the work done and undermines my authority. How can I get him to respect my authority without sounding like I don’t know he’s the boss?
Recommendation
Use the situation/impact/think/feel/want formula.
Say something like,
• While I think it’s great that you engage with my staff, when you make decisions without consulting me, it leaves me scrambling to find a way to get the work done. Also, my staff feels confused about the line of authority and I feel undermined in my leadership. I’d like for us to talk about how we can coordinate to get the work done and support each other’s positions here.
Do you have a communication question? You can Ask Meryl.
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There's lots of information about how to communicate |
Success Story
Award name change
For years I've been giving out an adorable giraffe as a thank-you award to people who share success stories with me. I've been calling it the Pippi Award. Thanks to feedback and a general over hall, I've renamed him/her Pippin - which is an admired person or thing.
Send me your success stories to get your Pippin Award. Thanks.
Passing complaints up the ladder
Issue
348 May 7, 2009 |
SpeakStrong Award
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Pippin "I said it strong"
SpeakStrong Award.
Got a burning (or nawing) communication question? Send it on. I'll give it my best shot.
Unless you request otherwise, I might post your question anonymously (disquising identifying details.) If I do, you might receive the benefit of input from others.
SpeakStrong Definition
To express yourself both powerfully &
effectively;
to say what you mean,
mean what you say,
without being mean
when you say it.