Meryl Runion,CSP is a speaker, trainer and author. Learn more.
This Week in the World
A renewed sense of aliveness
It seems many people are experiencing things in delightful new ways. Here are some comments I'm hearing.
"I’m experiencing something I haven’t felt for a long time. It feels like…happiness."
"My friends think I’ve changed, and it’s true that I have taken a 180 degree turn, not from who I was, but from how I express myself. I can’t do box living anymore."
"I’m not able to get comfortable with things that seem untrue lately. I’m hungry for direct connection."
"I’m seeing things that were always there, but I’m just now taking the time to notice them. It gives me a sense of peace."
"I’m allowing myself to pursue pleasure these days, and it’s working for me."
"I’m quietly excited. I haven’t felt this way for a long time."
What is particularly lovely is when people describe their experience in detail. One friend took me on a tour of how he hears music. I’ll never listen to music the same way again. Another shared her inner experience of bike riding. It made me what to take it up.
Could all the economic turmoil and change be creating a new sense of freedom in people? Or am I listening better? Perhaps it’s both. Because I’ve been experiencing the same thing. I’ve also been making choices that encourage those experiences. I hope you are too.
Speak Strong gives you all kinds of tools to help you listen to what’s happening inside, and to translate that into authentic communication.
I’d love to hear what awakenings you’re experiencing, how you see, hear, taste, touch and embrace beauty, and what’s working for you.
New Article
You Don't Call Me "Old" and I Don't Call You "Kid"
Intergenerational Communication in the Workforce
It's based on experiences from my intergenerational training, Walk in My Generation's Shoes. It's one thing to list intergeneratinal differences. It's another to see them in action.
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"Make it easy for people to give you what you want."
~ Meryl Runion
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PowerPhrase of the Week
Your complaint reflects a yearning
After Jody finished complaining about a friend she was having issues with, Evan told her,
- Your complaint reflects a yearning. Figure out what that yearning is and then see what you can do to fulfill that yearning in the most nourishing way possible.
This reminds me of one of my PowerPhrase Principles: to talk about what you want more than what you don’t want. My new book Speak Strong tells you how to do that.
Evan’s next question is,
- What are you doing for you?
Many complaints dissolve when people take better care of themselves.
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SpeakStrong is the next step after PowerPhrases!
Poison Phrase of the Week
Kids and Old People
I finally wrote up some observations from intergenerational communication training that I do. How do the younger workers and older workers collide, and how can they connect?
A couple Poison Phrases emerged from the training. Don’t call younger workers:
- Kids
Even if you mean it endearingly, it pulls rank. And don’t call elder workers:
- Old People.
That slipped out inadvertently several times. Here’s a hint for the Gen Xers and Millennials – Boomers don’t think they’re (we're) old, They also usually think they’re more with-it than they are. I observed that when a Boomer friend read my new article and said, “Jeepers, I talk more like a Millennial or a Gen Xer.” Jeepers? How many younger workers use Jeepers? Boomers may be deluded – but it doesn’t serve the kids…ahem, I mean the younger workers – to burst our bubble.
Read You Don't Call Me "Old" and I Don't Call You "Kid"
Intergenerational Communication in the Workforce.
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Reader question
Control issues
Meryl,
I am the ‘service owner’ for a software application, which I manage as part of my job. A new manager joined the department. He knows a lot about this software application and he keeps trying to take control away from me. For example, he makes changes without discussing them with me. I’ve asked him to put his requirements in writing, but he doesn’t.
How do I give him the message that I am the boss where this software is concerned, without being ‘nasty’ in the process.
Say,
- I see us as playing by different rules here. I’m trying to get us on the same team, and it seems to me you’re going for autonomy. What’s up about that? How can we start playing the same game and work together?
Let him know you’re open to his ideas about how to collaborate, since if you dictate terms of collaboration, it’s not really collaboration.
Do you have a communication question? You can Ask Meryl.
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Success Story
A sobering and refreshing conversation
Meryl, I did it. I was able to go to my coworker and it was a success. I told her it was hard for me to know how to confront a co-worker b/c I don’t want there to be any tension amongst us and I wanted clear things up so I wouldn’t brace myself for what feels like an attack when she speaks.
She was very receptive and very understanding. WOW! She suggested if I find her being snide, I just bring it to her attention. I’m so relieved now.
Note from Meryl – you’re relieved and I’m thrilled. You go
Success Story Submission
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Reader Blog Comments
A sobering and refreshing conversation
Communication month euphoria
I don't need to exaggerate
