Nuture, Nudge, and Sometimes Shove

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Clip art image of airplane and skydiver
I took up skydiving 35 years ago. My first jump scared me so much that I clenched the strut and screamed to the instructor that I had changed my mind. She pried my fingers from the bar and shoved me away from the plane. I was too preoccupied with my plunge to be stunned by her audacity. But when my chute opened and I started gently floating, I was grateful for her decisive action. I took my second jump on my own.

Clip art image of parachutist Speaking Strong can be like pushing someone out of an airplane. I recently learned that her pushing me was safer than pulling me back in. I was happy to know that, but I already was glad she forced me past my fears.

Nurturing and nudging aren’t always enough. At times, the most compassionate and appropriate action is a decisive shove. The people who are bold enough to push us when we need it are the people who impact us deeply.

Boldness is an important SpeakStrong quality.

But so are grace and savvy.

I hear strong individuals complain that people can’t handle their power. They hold themselves back to keep from hurting anyone. What they often don’t realize is it’s not their power people can’t handle; it’s their delivery.

Speak Strong book cover imageThat’s why powerful people need to develop SpeakStrong skills as much or even more than gentler people. As long as the bold lack awareness and skills, they will leave a wake of destruction behind them if they don’t curb their full power. Holding power back is both frustrating and a waste.

True power compassionately nurtures, diplomatically nudges and when needed, boldly shoves. When strength is balanced with sweetness and savvy, the bold can amp up the voltage without fear of blowing everyone’s circuits.

They often discover their expanded skills diminish the need to push anyone out of (metaphorical) airplanes. When sweetness and savvy are supported with boldness, and when boldness is supported by sweetness and savvy, people are inspired to jump on their own.

That’s what I call Speaking Strong.

Do a bold person a favor. Get them a copy of SpeakStrong.


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Meryl Runion and Speak Strong (SpeakStrong) provides Power Phrases (PowerPhrases) and other tools to help you improve communication skills at work and at home. You can read more about her at www.speakstrong.com.

Meryl is the author of six books on communication that have sold over a quarter million copies worldwide, including Speak Strong, PowerPhrases!, How to Use PowerPhrases, Perfect Phrases for Managers and Supervisors, and How to Say It: Performance Reviews. You can reach her at 719-684-2633, or by email:

You can also follow Meryl on Twitter: http://twitter.com/merylrunion.