August 30, 2006What Are Your Poison Phrase Pet Peeves?
What are your least favorite phrases? Here are some examples:
- “I’ll be honest with you”?
- “Whatever”
- “So”?
- “And your point is?”
Share your pet peeve phrases with me, and next week we will vote to determine the Poison Phrase we most love to hate. Email me or post your pet Poison Phrase peeve on my blog.
36 Comments »
RSS feed for comments on this post.
| TrackBack URI
You can also bookmark
this on del.icio.us or check the cosmos
No Problem,
Comment by Cindy Washam — August 30, 2006 @ 3:09 pm
oh, my husband HATES ‘whatever’! He says I could at LEAST have an opinion one way or the other! So, I try not to use it, but I have to admit it still slips out sometimes.
Comment by Mary Pleiss — August 30, 2006 @ 3:19 pm
The response “What?”, when someone’s name is called.
Comment by Janeen McLean — August 30, 2006 @ 3:21 pm
“I hate to say this, but…”
ARGH!!!!!!! My internal reply is always a resounding: THEN DON’T!!!! But instead, I say, “What’s that, dear?”
Comment by Cindy Mueller — August 30, 2006 @ 4:14 pm
My other personal “favorite” phrase to hate:
“Shut Up!”
(especially when used to express surprise or disbelief). I don’t much care to hear it when it is used to request silence, but this new use is driving me crazy.
Comment by Cindy Mueller — August 30, 2006 @ 5:25 pm
“It is what it is.”
What does this mean??!! Seems to be saying nothing, lacks creativity and it so overused these days.
Comment by Jenn — August 31, 2006 @ 7:22 am
Oh, one more I just thought of:
“Can I ask you a question….?”
JUST ask it already!
Comment by Jenn — August 31, 2006 @ 7:23 am
You do not know what you are talking about. Another is no comment at all, as if you did not speak.
Comment by Peggy — August 31, 2006 @ 7:42 am
I have a couple that really irks my bubbles!!
1) “I don’t care!” I would say it’s about as bad as “whatever”. When hearing this, I mention that I do not want to hear any comments then for the decision that is made as it came across as that person really did not care.
2) “Bite me!” Where did this come from? Why would I want to “bite someone”? Does not make any sense!
Comment by Sandy — August 31, 2006 @ 10:25 am
Three phrases that annoy me are:
“I don’t care.” When you are asking someone for their opinion on what to do or where to go and they say I don’t care, to me it seems like they are saying I don’t give a s@#t.
“It is easy.” Especially when they have done that specific thing before and they know it is not easy.
“There, there.” When someone is trying to console you.
Comment by Lizzette — August 31, 2006 @ 11:41 am
The phrase that annoys me most is: “It’s all good”
Comment by June Davenport — August 31, 2006 @ 2:38 pm
“Fine!” - when someone is just agreeing to end a conversation.
“Just for you” - sarcastically when someone is asked/has to do something for someone else and they don’t want to do it.
Comment by Lisa — September 5, 2006 @ 9:50 am
“Thank You Captain Obvious”
Comment by Andrea — September 6, 2006 @ 12:10 pm
At a previous job, we had a controller that would come over and ask how things were going - he had a knack of doing this during the busiest time at year end. His comment, no matter what your answer was, was “Hang in there!” I grew to HATE that comment!
Comment by Cindy — September 6, 2006 @ 12:21 pm
My vote for Most Poison Pet Peeve is one already submitted: “it is what it is.” Occasionally, when I’ve heard it too often from one person, I’ll bring up the fact that it is the title of one of Rumi’s manuscripts–Rumi being a mystical Islamic poet who died in 1273–and I find their quoting from Islam fascinating.
My vote for one that’s not (yet) on your list: “At the end of the day.” Geez. I well remember one corporate conference call wherein the (extremely highly-placed female executive) speaker used it, seriously, 24 times. In 30 minutes. I don’t even understand how that can happen.
Thanks for letting me rant!
Kelly
Comment by Kelly Graham — September 6, 2006 @ 12:40 pm
“You know more than I do”
This phrase is repeated over and over scarcastically in an apparent effort evade and avoid answering questions or provide information that would be helpful or otherwise valuable to staff.
Comment by Mel — September 6, 2006 @ 2:06 pm
When someone is speaking directly to you, and they say, “How are WE?” Drives me nuts! I can speak for myself, but who else is included in the WE that they expect an answer for???? (I know, I should just think - ‘me, myself, & I.’) WE are fine, thank you.
Comment by Lee — September 7, 2006 @ 3:26 pm
My Most Poison Pet Peeve is “My bad” when someone makes a mistake. It doesn’t sound like a sincere apology or makes the mistake seem insignificant.
Comment by Brenda — September 7, 2006 @ 6:12 pm
“Sucks to be You”.
Comment by Sandra — October 11, 2006 @ 2:42 pm
“Sure.”
An answer like “sure” is so ambiguous….In my opinion most successful bosses and employees are decisive and confident.
Comment by Lauren — October 18, 2006 @ 11:54 am
My Most Poison Pet Peeve phrase is:
“Like I said.” It implies that the listener is an idiot and needs to have everything repeated.
Comment by Julie Shin — November 17, 2006 @ 1:45 pm
When I try to explain my point of view to my husband, he says” Are you done?” Total disrespect!
Comment by patricia kaefer — November 20, 2007 @ 6:24 pm
I have a few Poison Phrases I’d like to banish from the lexicon. These are a direct result of my marriage. Both “I don’t care” and “fine” (as a complete statement when you are OBVIOUSLY not fine) as well as the ever annoying “What? I didn’t say anything”. The latter is used as a defense mechanism when called out about non-verbal communincation (e.g. eye rolling, sighing, teeth sucking, etc.). I’d like to see a Speakstrong book/workshop about non-verbal communications. Perhaps a good working title is, “Speaking Strong Without Saying a Word”.
Comment by Nichole — November 28, 2007 @ 3:19 pm
I was interested in Patricia’s comment
“When I try to explain my point of view to my husband, he says” Are you done?” Total disrespect!”
I suppose the wording and perhaps the tone would determine the intent, but on first reading I thought this was good communication on the part of the husband. He was clarifying if Patricia had any more to say before giving his opinion/feedback.
Maybe the wording could be better e.g.”Is there anything else you’d like to say?”
I need to do more of this, myself. A colleague who was leaving the company recently, was handing over his job to me. I found myself repeatedly interrupting with questions, to which he would patiently reply - “I’ll get to that in a minute”. I soon learned to wait until he had finished, before asking questions, and often I had none, as they had all been covered.
Pam
Comment by Pam — November 30, 2007 @ 6:54 pm
Good point Pam - and thanks for giving Patricia the benefit of the doubt based on context before pointing out other possible interpretations.
I’m sure some use this phrase to mean something like, “Do I have to tolerate any more of this?” or to suggest they’ve just been waiting for someone to finish so they can have a turn.
And for others, it’s a clumsy way to make sure the other person has had the opportunity to complete their thought process.
When I talk with someone who makes their points slowly, I sometimes don’t realize when they pause for emphasis or thinking that it isn’t my turn yet. One fellow in particular would pause, I’d jump in, and he’d listen. Then when I stopped, he’d continue with what he had intended to say, and I realized the pause didn’t mean he was done.
He was a very good client, so it was certainly in my interest to adapt to his style.
Comment by merylrunion — December 3, 2007 @ 8:39 am
Good ones, Nichole. “What? I didn’t say anything” while rolling eyes is so passive-aggressive.
The response, of course, is to say what you mean and mean what you say without being mean when you say it. For example:
Your words and gestures don’t match which is confusing to me. I’m inclined to believe your gestures, but I’d like to discuss this until it’s clear.
Passive-aggressive communication used to shut me down. I’m not around it any more, so I don’t know how quick to respond i would be. Anyway, thanks!
Comment by merylrunion — December 3, 2007 @ 8:58 am
My poison pet peeve are:
1. When one replies, “I guess”
2. When my boss highlights all meetings and trainings
“MANDATORY”, sometimes it’s just general staff mtg.
3. lastly, using “you know what I’m saying?” at the end of each sentence.
Comment by Charity — December 5, 2007 @ 11:49 am
“Let me (acts/axe) you a question”
Is the speaker saying they are too ignorant to know the proper pronunciation?
Is the speaker saying you are too ignorant to know the proper pronunciation?
Or is the speaker saying they don’t respect themselves, or you enough to bother with pronunciation?
Comment by josh tolliver — December 5, 2007 @ 3:44 pm
“Don’t misinterpret me”
“I am not fussing”
Comment by Majesta Lang — December 10, 2007 @ 8:46 pm
I, like, really don’t like, you know, like extra words that sound, you know, like unnecessary. You know? :+)
Comment by DLPoff — December 19, 2007 @ 1:06 pm
I cured my husband from saying “Bite me”. I reached over and playfully acted as if I was going to take a chunk out of his arm. That was over 6 yrs ago, and he has rarely said it since. When he does, he backs up. We both just laugh.
Comment by Janell — December 20, 2007 @ 9:07 am
“I told you already.”
Well, you know what? People don’t remember everything they are told. Grrr.
Comment by Sean — December 20, 2007 @ 4:40 pm
What is the definition of a “poison phrase”? It seems to me that many of the expressions listed are overused and tiresome. Does that make them poison? Some of the others depend on context and/or tone of voice. Let’s be careful about “throwing the baby out with the bath water” (to use another trite expression)!
Comment by Anne Dryden — January 8, 2008 @ 2:20 pm
I define a Poison Phrase as something that derails a conversation rather than moving it forward. It could be inflammatory or unclear, and the same phrase that is a PowerPhrase in one context could be Poison Phrase in another. So it’s not an exact science.
Thanks for asking!
Comment by merylrunion — February 3, 2008 @ 10:20 pm
A phrase that makes me cringe:
“Let me circle back with you….”
just say, I’ll let you know.
Circle back? I picture a car going around the block.
Comment by Carla — April 23, 2008 @ 11:09 am
I found it very interesting reading all the poison phrases that have been submitted, as well as how many of them I could identify with. One I would like to add is “yeah, but”. this is usually followed with a lengthy excuse to justify why an item has not been dealt with or the person is avoiding dealing with. (when is it spoken, it reminds me of Abbot and Costello when Costello hollars “Heeeeeey AAAAbbooooooot!” Any time Costello used this tone, he had done something that was not going to make Abbot happy. The parallel is uncanny sometimes.
Comment by Rosemary — April 30, 2008 @ 11:50 pm