October 17, 2006An Employee Who Lies
I subscribe to your newsletter, and find it a valuable resource. I often forward it to others, to share your wisdom and viewpoints.
Question, if you are able to answer.
I have an employee that I know has lied.
1) This employee is late to work too often. She and a co-worker live together. One day last week the co-worker had to go out of town for a funeral; the employee said she ran late because she had to do something for the co-worker. I asked the co-worker about this; the co-worker had not asked the employee in question to do anything that morning.
2) This employee was out of work one day last week, due to having to be in court for a divorce. The day after, I asked the employee how it went; the employee said the divorce is not finalized due to missing paperwork. She gave me no indication that she did not go to court as planned; actually her recount of the situation indicated that a court appearance was made and the information about paperwork came as a result of that appearance. Later that afternoon, a very reliable source tells me this: the employee came into the accounting office telling another worker that she did not go to court. The employee said that her future ex-husband told her that he still loves her and does not want a divorce, so they did not even go to court. Now, I believe that probably the version told to me was more correct and that the version told out loud (in earshot of more that the person she was addressing) in the accounting office was a “fantasy” version. Or, reality could be a hybrid of these two scenarios, with neither version being all truth or all lie. As for this time missed from work, she will be deducted for these hours. Does that fact really impact my dilemma? Or should I disregard the details about her day out, since it was unpaid time off?
How best to “speak strong” to address this employee? I appreciate your input.
Meryl Responds
Address her tardiness independently of the honesty issue. You say she is late too often – what does that mean? Is there a policy about how often employees are allowed to be late? If no, how can she or you know what is too often? If yes, are you enforcing it? If no, it’s time to let this employee and anyone else who might think the policy is a suggestion and not an official policy know the consequences of future incidents. Say,
- Our lateness policy has become unclear due to the number of exceptions we have made. Because of that, I want to remind you what it is, and let you know I will enforce it effective immediately.
That is what you’ll say to the group, but you may need to spell out the implications of that to this individual separately.
Her dishonesty is a separate issue, and if it was me, I certainly would address it. First of all, take away any reason to lie that you can. If there are policies that encourage lying such as some reasons for tardiness that are accepted and others that are not, the policy needs to be changed or the reasons need to require documentation.
Personally, I dislike like being lied to, and if I knew someone was lying to me, I would address it. Don’t get caught in a quagmire of what really happened in past incidents, but do let her know,
- I’m aware that you lied to me about absences and late arrivals. First, it feels like betrayal to know that I can’t count on you to be truthful. Second, I need for you to understand how important your presence here is. Your colleagues are happy to cover for you for emergencies but it’s an unfair burden to the rest of us to cover for you under false impressions about what is happening.
From what you said, it sounds like she is going through a difficult time, and you probably will want to be as gentle as you can be, but still be firm. Her personal difficulties are reasons to be compassionate, but she still needs to be held to the standards of the job.
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Hello Meryl,
I have purchased your books and read your newsletter, great material.
on the issue of “An Employee Who Lies” there is a whole different level not discussed here and was overshadowed by the honesty issue.
If an employee has earned time off and their work is caught up it is no business of the employer what an employee does on their time off.
Thank you for you newsletter.
Comment by Scott — October 25, 2006 @ 2:20 pm
Scott, you’re right. I did mention taking away the reason to lie. I don’t like being lied to even if there is no reason to lie, so if that is the case I’d recommend she say,
* I understand you were not truthful with me about your absences. If you are using your paid time off, I don’t need to know why you were gone. If you chose to tell me, please be truthful.
Thanks.
Comment by merylrunion — October 26, 2006 @ 12:37 pm