January 18, 2007When the Truth is Inconvenient
When the Truth is Inconvenient
“I know what I should have said when I introduced you yesterday,” Cindi informed me. She had all of ten minutes notice to prepare her introduction for me, and she did a great job, but I was curious to know what she would have said had she been given time to think about it.
“I’d say, ‘Meryl doesn’t just teach this stuff, she lives it. She always tells the truth, which I find…inconvenient.’” We both enjoyed a good laugh.
In the ten years of our friendship, there have been many opportunities to tell or not to tell - inconvenient truths. There have been moments of tension and discomfort. But in the end, our willingness to tell the truth has been the bedrock of our friendship.
Not everyone appreciates the “inconvenience” of friends who tell the truth - but my best friends come to decide it’s the quality of friendship they treasure most.
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I enjoyed your story and indeed I rely on my closest friend to always tell me the truth. However, I am also reminded of a co-worker who was constantly “brutally honest” to the point where I told her it was a little over the top. Her response was, “You wouldn’t want me to lie, would you?” So I think that the choices are to be inconveniently honest or if it would be a little TOO much, to maybe soften an honest remark with a disclaimer such as “If it were me, I would want…” or “I know we are best friends and always honest with each other, but I’m afraid my opinion might come out as less than supportive.” My bff usually approaches delicate subjects with “Do you really want me to be honest with this one?” And then I’m prepared for what is usually a (helpful) constructive criticism, “inconvenient” or not! Thank you Cindi and Meryl!
Comment by Joan Schliewenz — January 18, 2007 @ 2:32 pm