http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/2007/03/22/when-other-people-are-angry/ By Meryl Runion and SpeakStrong, Inc. Thu, 28 Aug 2008 18:18:00 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.1 http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/2007/03/22/when-other-people-are-angry/#comment-1096 merylrunion Thu, 29 Mar 2007 17:35:15 +0000 http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/2007/03/22/when-other-people-are-angry/#comment-1096 Great question to ask, Michele. Do you have a dog in a fight or not! Thanks! Great question to ask, Michele. Do you have a dog in a fight or not! Thanks!

]]> http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/2007/03/22/when-other-people-are-angry/#comment-1078 Michele Bartlett Thu, 22 Mar 2007 23:03:42 +0000 http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/2007/03/22/when-other-people-are-angry/#comment-1078 My elderly mother's best friend stopped in for a visit while I was with my mother for a couple of weeks. Dorothy and Mom started arguing about something they have often argued about before. I found myself in the middle, trying to help each see the other's point of view, through reframing, feedback, etc. They both ended up using me as some sort of communication filter. It felt like they were both trying to win brownie points with me. Mom said their argument was unusual; they generally just agree to disagree. The next week, Dorothy came back and it started again. This time, I told myself, "I don't have a dog in this fight," and went into another room, where I could still hear them carrying on, but at least I wasn't enmeshed in it. Unless the writer is in a position of authority/responsibility between the warring parties, I'd suggest the writer try letting them duke it out sans input. My elderly mother’s best friend stopped in for a visit while I was with my mother for a couple of weeks. Dorothy and Mom started arguing about something they have often argued about before. I found myself in the middle, trying to help each see the other’s point of view, through reframing, feedback, etc. They both ended up using me as some sort of communication filter. It felt like they were both trying to win brownie points with me. Mom said their argument was unusual; they generally just agree to disagree. The next week, Dorothy came back and it started again. This time, I told myself, “I don’t have a dog in this fight,” and went into another room, where I could still hear them carrying on, but at least I wasn’t enmeshed in it. Unless the writer is in a position of authority/responsibility between the warring parties, I’d suggest the writer try letting them duke it out sans input.

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