In my experience, people who behave in the way you described, are feeling powerless. They’re standing behind a boulder and throwing stones, because they feel they have no other options left to them. Giving the employee an opportunity to address the underlying concerns may solve not only the immediate problem, but also create a foundation for a better relationship with that employee in the future. But I think to serve that purpose, the approach has to come from a place of concern for the employee first, on the part of the boss, rather than a concern for the work place. That can come later, in a summarizing moment, if appropriate.

The only thing I am hesitant about in Meryl’s advice is specifically the “you don’t want to be here” wording. For me, this particular phrasing conjures up some “love it or leave it” associations. In business arenas it seems to be a common ploy to give the subtle, or not so subtle, impression that if you are not “happy” then you are not a team player or you should be somewhere else. That slant to me is no different than the employee who is taking a feeble and indirect way to address concerns. It is a way of avoiding dealing with issues directly, or perhaps the intended message really is “please be a robot and bring nothing to the workplace but what it takes to do the job.”

I know I have gone off in a direction Meryl was not intending to go. My reaction to those particular words may emphasize the point made in management training that different aged employees are motivated by different things. (And therefore, de-motivated by different things I suppose.)