June 26, 2007Why is this Happening Again?
Comedian Kathy Griffin is outrageous, over the top and irreverent. If you like that, you’ll love her. If you don’t, you won’t. Her program My Life on the “D” List shows her in front of hysterical audiences and disapproving ones.
It portrays several meeting planners asking her to tone herself down right before or early into her presentation. Hiring Kathy and asking her to tone herself down is like hiring Michael Moore and asking him not to criticize corporations. It’s like hiring Billy Graham and asking him not to discuss God. It’s like hiring me and asking me not to talk about communication. It doesn’t make sense.
I understand how this could happen occasionally, but I’d think after two or three fiascos, Kathy’s staff would learn to initiate a conversation about who Kathy is and what Kathy does.
But it keeps happening – “surprises” that could have been avoided if only someone had the foresight to initiate a conversation.
If you keep experiencing the same misunderstandings, ask yourself if there’s a conversation you need to have up front. It could save you headaches.
1 Comment »
RSS feed for comments on this post.
| TrackBack URI
You can also bookmark
this on del.icio.us or check the cosmos
Good point! I struggle with misunderstandings and my resultant hurt feelings too often. Last year while talking to a counselor, I heard myself complaining about yet another situation where someone I cared about did something that hurt my feelings, made me angry, or somehow made me feel disrespected.
I took a step outside my own head and listened to the words coming out of my mouth. When I interrupted “the loop”, I realized how tired of was of hearing myself complain about someone else “hurting my feelings.”
I stopped talking and asked myself what was I doing that allowed these situations to occur, then I took another step and asked myself what I was specifically doing to set up or encourage these situations. I realized I have a tendency toward passive-aggressive behavior. I go along and smile, pretending it’s all good, and then get angry when the other person doesn’t do or say what I wanted or expected.
I am beginning to recognize the whiny tone, the complaint loop, or certain words I use as an indicator that a misunderstanding is brewing. I realize I haven’t communicated openly and honestly with someone and that I’m heading for a confrontation.
I’m working on identifying the situations or opportunities to communicate honestly up front, before situations develop. One major challenge I’ve found when attempting to communicate openly and honestly with others, is thinking through what I really want/need first, then feeling open and brave enough to communicate my thoughts/feelings/needs.
Comment by Cynthia Mueller — July 19, 2007 @ 11:15 am