September 4, 2007PowerPhrase: I want a widget that lists for five pesos
Kendra is an abstract thinker and Brian is very concrete. That created a lot of confusion when they tried to divide their assets. Kendra wanted to devise a system to appropriate their assets. Brian wanted to dive in with what to do with the individual items. So when Kendra said, “let’s say the file cabinet is worth $500″ to provide an example, Brian immediately latched on to the example and wanted to dispute whether it was really worth $500 or not.
Kendra had a stroke of genius. She said,
- Okay, let’s do this: if I’m just using something as an example, I’ll call it a widget. Then you’ll know I’m speaking in principle, not about the item itself.
That’s what she did - but she took it one step further. She said,
- Let’s say I want a widget that lists for five Pesos.
Since neither of them use widgets or Pesos, it was clear to Brian that she was speaking in principle, and he stopped being distracted by the examples.
Update:
I provide another example of this principle when I refer to the “Stars Political Party” and the “Stripes Political Party” in a post here. I did it to keep the focus on communication and avoid a debate about who does what.
Email This Post
Related posts which may interest you
- This Week in the World ~ don’t hang up while I insult you
- Laid Off for Speaking Up
- This Week in the World: What would you like to know about how to talk to your political opposite?
- This Week in the World: Unite and Concur
- Inattention Deficit, Convenient Truth, Silenced by Fear of Political Incorrectness, Pick Up the Phone, Stay on Topic
3 Comments »
RSS feed for comments on this post.
| TrackBack URI
You can also bookmark
this on del.icio.us or check the cosmos
What a marvelous idea! My husband and I frequently have this same type of communication problem. I am usually struggling for some way to make my point more understandable and avoid the usual derailment. I will certainly try this and hopefully keep the discussion more on track.
Comment by Connie — September 11, 2007 @ 10:12 am
Let me know how it works, Connie,
Another plus of this kind of code is it symbolizes bridging the gap. So as soon as you use the word, he knows you’re honoring his style.
Comment by merylrunion — September 15, 2007 @ 9:18 pm
[...] to political radio which I will call “Star Radio.” (To understand why, read my Pesos Widget post here.) A supporter of the “Stripes” party called in, and began by saying, “I hope [...]
Pingback by A PowerPhrase A Week » This Week in the World ~ don’t hang up while I insult you — September 22, 2007 @ 9:29 am