March 27, 2008Power Phrase ~ I can understand that

When I mediate conflict, I listen for the one thing each person needs acknowledgment for before they can really hear the other – and I almost always find one. Once that is acknowledged, they can start hearing each other.

Sometimes it’s that the other person made a mistake or was harsh, other times it’s acknowledgment for their own efforts, often it’s simply that the other person can imagine how they can see things the way they do. That’s why the phrase,

• I can understand that

breaks deadlocks. Acknowledging without agreeing is a great skill. You don’t have to agree with their perspective to acknowledge it. You just need to be able to stand in their shoes, look out, and acknowledge how the world looks to them.

You can find more phrases to acknowledge without agreeing in PowerPhrases! and in the free sample chapter here.

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