August 8, 2008Ask Meryl ~ The problem with…
Meryl,
My director starts many sentences about staff and co-workers as “The problem with ________ is….” She is always quick to name names and give examples.
What can I say to her that would let her know this is unfair, unsolicited and unnecessary? This makes me angry because she appears to be planting seeds.
Meryl says,
Use the formula, when… the effect is… what I’d prefer is… For example,
When you tell me the trouble with someone, I feel disloyal in listening but disloyal to you if I don’t. I‘d like to speak about people the same way I would if they’re in the room.
How does that sound?
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