August 21, 2008This Week in the World ~ The Power of Silence
Saying so much about so little
Have you ever thought about why you talk? One PowerPhrase Principle is that PowerPhrases are targeted. You decide what you want your words to accomplish and choose your words accordingly.
Trainers will tell you that men tend to communicate to relay facts and women tend to communicate to connect and relate. But what if the facts have been relayed and the connection is solid? What then?
How about silence?
Chatter dilutes and drowns out substantive communication. If you don’t have anything to say, why not say the most powerful thing of all? Why not say nothing?
What a concept – only speak when you have something to say
I think of my father – a great man who is also a man of few words. He doesn’t speak much – but when he does, people listen. We listen because we know he wouldn’t be speaking if he didn’t have something to say.
People who are comfortable with themselves and each other are also comfortable with silence. They may speak to convey information and they may speak to convey heartfelt emotion. What they don’t do is speak to fill silence.
The purpose of words is to create silence. Not the silence of suppression. Not the silence of the lambs. The silence of completion.
Words well spoken
I had the most wonderful week hosting a man who has much to say. You can read about and hear a few of his words here.
I am left with the sweet feeling that comes from hearing so many words of wisdom. Now I feel pulled to sink into silence.
I will be speaking again soon. I have some TeleSeminars up my sleeve. Stay tuned.
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Hi Meryl,
Your comments about silence reminded me of a time over 35 years ago. I was 20 and at Outward Bound, a personal development camp. At that time I had someting to say about everything, a story from somewhere, I knew someone who had done the same thing, a crude joke, a comment. After a few days my team leader took me aside and told me how it was driving everyone up the pole. He said “Just try shutting up” I did, and said very little for the next couple of weeks.
At one point, we had a particularly difficult challenge to overcome and there was intense discussion. I tried to speak, but my voice was lost until one of the team said “Hey fellers, Malcolm says almost nothing and now he has something to say. It may be important and I think we should listen.” I got a good hearing and my idea was accepted as the best solution. For the remainder of the camp, when I spoke I was listened to. That was a powerful lesson. I have continued on with that practice.
Meryl, an offshoot of that is how much I really get to hear.
Of interest, the challenge was, with a team of eight, standing knee deep in a swift stream, how to get the whole team over a rope suspended six feet off the ground without touching it. It was a time trial.
Comment by Malcolm — August 25, 2008 @ 4:16 pm