September 18, 2008Ask Meryl ~ Coworker complaining
Meryl,
I have a coworker who likes to complain to me about nearly everything that happens to her on the job. I am a patient, empathetic listener and value our working friendship, but her frequent interruptions are starting to cost me productivity. Instead of bringing this to our supervisor, I feel the brave thing would be for me to tell her directly. But I’m not sure what to say. Can I save our friendship while minimizing the interruptions?
Meryl Responds,
First, be aware that if you DON’T speak up, the friendship will be challenged by the lack of transparency. Second, it’s interesting that you mention that she’s complaining, but you cite the issue is as productivity issue. I’m going to guess that the fact that it’s complaints you’re hearing is part of the problem. Third, if you can’t address the issue without damaging the friendship, it’s not much of a friendship.
Say something like,
- I’ve got to reign myself in and cut back on how much I talk with you because it’s interfering with my productivity. Let’s limit ourselves to a few minutes of check-in and quick problem-solving conversations during business hours and relegate the longer issues to break times.
Then, if she tries to complain during business hours, say,
- Can it wait? I’ve got a pile of work to do.
- If it’s a complaint session, surely it can wait.
Or you could say,
- (Name), I’ve got 2 minutes and then I need to get back to work.
Let me know how it works.
No Comments »
RSS feed for comments on this post.
| TrackBack URI
You can also bookmark
this on del.icio.us or check the cosmos
