Comments on: Ask Meryl ~ They talk over me http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/2008/10/10/ask-meryl-they-talk-over-me/ By Meryl Runion and SpeakStrong, Inc. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 02:34:58 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3 By: Grace http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/2008/10/10/ask-meryl-they-talk-over-me/comment-page-1/#comment-455056 Grace Thu, 08 Apr 2010 02:58:42 +0000 http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/?p=784#comment-455056 I sometimes have trouble coming to the point, often adding in too many qualifiers and self-deprecating comments. If I'm not consciously choosing to edit myself, people get impatient and talk over me. It's hurtful, but with awareness of my communication problem I've learned to watch people very closely for clues that they are getting impatient so I know I have to stop sidetracking and get to the point. So if you're guilty of "holding the floor" as Meryl says, you're not alone! P.S. Meryl, you made my day mentioning me in your newsletter! :) I sometimes have trouble coming to the point, often adding in too many qualifiers and self-deprecating comments. If I’m not consciously choosing to edit myself, people get impatient and talk over me. It’s hurtful, but with awareness of my communication problem I’ve learned to watch people very closely for clues that they are getting impatient so I know I have to stop sidetracking and get to the point. So if you’re guilty of “holding the floor” as Meryl says, you’re not alone!

P.S. Meryl, you made my day mentioning me in your newsletter! :)

]]> By: merylrunion http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/2008/10/10/ask-meryl-they-talk-over-me/comment-page-1/#comment-455036 merylrunion Sun, 04 Apr 2010 21:38:19 +0000 http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/?p=784#comment-455036 Margaret - the first two phrases might work for you. I share your confusion over why they people would talk over you and call you aggressive - it sounds backwards. It would be tough to know how to deal with the situation without understanding what you do that they consider aggressive and why they talk over you. Why not ask? Labels like "aggressive" are disheartening. Specific information about habits and behaviors and suggestions of how to change them are very useful. If I were to guess, I'd imagine that you hold the floor longer than most people and miss cues when other people want to contribute to the conversation. But that is just a guess. If you ask someone who knows you, they could tell you more definitively. That could ease your frustration.... Margaret – the first two phrases might work for you. I share your confusion over why they people would talk over you and call you aggressive – it sounds backwards. It would be tough to know how to deal with the situation without understanding what you do that they consider aggressive and why they talk over you. Why not ask?

Labels like “aggressive” are disheartening. Specific information about habits and behaviors and suggestions of how to change them are very useful.

If I were to guess, I’d imagine that you hold the floor longer than most people and miss cues when other people want to contribute to the conversation. But that is just a guess. If you ask someone who knows you, they could tell you more definitively. That could ease your frustration….

]]> By: Margaret http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/2008/10/10/ask-meryl-they-talk-over-me/comment-page-1/#comment-454984 Margaret Wed, 31 Mar 2010 16:46:25 +0000 http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/?p=784#comment-454984 People talk over me too, execpt rather than telling me to be more assertive, I am told that I am too aggressive. What's up with that? I have rationalized people who talk over me (my boss) that they have a thought and have to get it out before they forget. But I agree, this makes me feel very conflicted when I am told that I am too aggressive but people talk over me. People talk over me too, execpt rather than telling me to be more assertive, I am told that I am too aggressive. What’s up with that? I have rationalized people who talk over me (my boss) that they have a thought and have to get it out before they forget. But I agree, this makes me feel very conflicted when I am told that I am too aggressive but people talk over me.

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