March 24, 2009This Week in the World ~ Classes, Who’s Crazy?
Learn to SpeakStrong in Denver, Vancouver Island and Colorado Springs
Most of my speaking events are closed for private groups. I do have an open event scheduled for April 30 in Denver. It’s an all day event, and will be worth flying in to attend. The flyer is available here.
I am also considering a SpeakStrong Smart and Sweet retreat on Vancouver Island and one in Colorado Spring this summer. Let me know if you’re interested.
New “Meryl’s Sharable Parable”: Ego Management
If you ever struggle with ego and identity issues (what? me?), you’ll love this parable.
Half Glass’s Egoic Adventures: A lesson in labels, perspectives and identity
The parable opens some questions for Reader Discussion. How do you know when you’re having and egoic reaction? That discussion is here.
Men and Women: One of us must be crazy
Hear what?
My friend switched off the radio and said, “This song hurts my ears. The singer’s voice is not engineered for a woman’s ear. Women need more low tones, a bottom, more grounding.”
She explained the dynamics of psychoacoustics, saying, “Most women will turn music without low tones off and they won’t know why. Most men don’t even hear the tones that women find painful.”
See what?
We don’t just hear things differently. My husband pointed out an article about how most men don’t notice a new hairstyle because they don’t even see hair. They focus more on faces. A man can deeply love a woman and not notice her radical new do.
Feel what?
Most of us discovered long ago that men and women process feelings and physical touch differently. If we’re also processing sound and sight in such different ways, how can we communicate at all?
One of us must be crazy
I told my husband about a (well-engineered) song by Pete McCormick called “The Woman I Love Is Crazy.” My husband exclaimed, “I like that title. Women see things so differently from men that at times they seem crazy to us. I suppose women think the same thing about men.”
Actually, I rarely hear women complain about men being crazy. A woman’s version of Pete’s song would more likely be “The man I love is rigid,” or, “The man I love is linear.” Note – we love them – we just might not always know how to talk to them.
Bridging the gap
While it’s a challenge to talk to those who perceive and process information in such radically different ways, some people do bridge the gaps. There are male sound engineers who know how to appeal to a woman’s ear. There male hairdressers who know exactly what women want. There also are plenty of women who can be linear with the best of the guys. If we judge, excoriate and dismiss someone’s style, we’ll miss the richness that comes from becoming “bi-lingual.”
My free Communication Style Quiz isn’t about gender differences, but it can help bridge the gap between you and people whose perception is worlds apart from yours. If you think one of you must be crazy, you’re missing an opportunity.
Here’s a comment I received about the quiz this week.
“Thank you for an absolutely accurate assessment.
It reminds me to practice … to make permanent on development areas.”
I’ll be presenting on communication styles at the Colorado Safety Association Conference May 13th.
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Related posts which may interest you
- Reader Discussion ~ How do you know if you’re having an egoic reaction?
- This Week in the World ~ An invitation to SpeakStrong in Love: FREE presentation in Denver, article summary
- This Week – she took it like a man
- Style quiz: My hubby made space for shoes before he bought them. I’m finding space for last year’s pair http://speakstrong.com/inventory
- SS Reader question: Self esteem and Poison Phrases
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Hey! You landed in my world with this post! I am so excited about helping people realize they are “3 Headed”, which in a nutshell means – Everyone has all modes of learning styles inside, just some of the styles are more developed than others. So a person isn’t “visual” or “auditory” or “kinesthetic” or “digital auditory” or about hundred other ways to divide human aspects, they contain the seeds of *all* of them. Anyway, I use this currently with my clients in developing their hard-copy and internet marketing, but the future holds teaching this in a more direct way –
Phyllis
Comment by Phyllis — March 25, 2009 @ 5:06 pm
Wow, that song you mentioned is stunning.
Thanks for the link to listen!
M~
Comment by Melody — March 28, 2009 @ 2:24 pm