Comments on: Reader Question: A verbal alligator pit called work http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/2009/08/25/reader-question-a-verbal-alligator-pit-called-work/ By Meryl Runion and SpeakStrong, Inc. Mon, 30 Aug 2010 12:09:47 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: merylrunion http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/2009/08/25/reader-question-a-verbal-alligator-pit-called-work/comment-page-1/#comment-454045 merylrunion Fri, 04 Sep 2009 14:52:32 +0000 http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/?p=1685#comment-454045 Great suggestion! Your key word is "refocus," and that takes it out of the alligator pit into a productive consideration. The old principle of "talk about what yu want more than what you don't want." Thanks! Great suggestion! Your key word is “refocus,” and that takes it out of the alligator pit into a productive consideration. The old principle of “talk about what yu want more than what you don’t want.” Thanks!

]]> By: Judy http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/2009/08/25/reader-question-a-verbal-alligator-pit-called-work/comment-page-1/#comment-454022 Judy Mon, 31 Aug 2009 19:27:10 +0000 http://www.speakstrong.com/newsletter/?p=1685#comment-454022 Regarding the "put downs", until you have a specific power phrase to say, you can always respond with something generic, such as: "That was uncalled for" or "inappropriate" or "hurtful". Whatever word you choose, take a deep breath, say it as a matter-of-fact statement, and move on. (For example, "That was uncalled for; what I need from you is...") I've done this before, and the very fact that I'm calling the person out on their words is often enough to refocus the conversation back to the facts versus the using mean, hurtful, and emotional words. Hope this helps... Regarding the “put downs”, until you have a specific power phrase to say, you can always respond with something generic, such as: “That was uncalled for” or “inappropriate” or “hurtful”. Whatever word you choose, take a deep breath, say it as a matter-of-fact statement, and move on. (For example, “That was uncalled for; what I need from you is…”)

I’ve done this before, and the very fact that I’m calling the person out on their words is often enough to refocus the conversation back to the facts versus the using mean, hurtful, and emotional words.

Hope this helps…

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