May 31, 2010PowerPhrase: The 5 whys uncover the source of a problem
My collaborator Lee sent me a link to an article about the 5 whys. The initial example makes their value quite clear.
- My car will not start. (the problem)
- Why? – The battery is dead. (first why)
- Why? – The alternator is not functioning. (second why)
- Why? – The alternator belt has broken. (third why)
- Why? – The alternator belt was well beyond its useful service life and has never been replaced. (fourth why)
- Why? – I have not been maintaining my car according to the recommended service schedule. (fifth why, a root cause)
- Why? – Replacement parts are not available because of the extreme age of my vehicle.(sixth why, optional footnote)
- I will start maintaining my car according to the recommended service schedule. (solution)
What a simple approach that could save a boatload of troubles.
May 31, 2010PowerPhrase: Either it is a value or a facade
I love my network! One of my newsletter readers is reviewing my Dynamic Leader Development manuscript. I write about checkbook values, referring to the checkbook as the indicator of what we truly value. Lee commented,
- Either it is a value or a facade.
I call that cutting through the crap. I’ve struggled recently with people I care about who don’t walk their talk. who say one thing and do another. His words just put the whole thing into perspective for me.
PowerPhrases do that. The really good ones really do that really well.
May 29, 2010PowerPhrase: I’m mixed and trending upwards
What do you say when someone casually asks how you are when you’re reeling from discovering that someone you’ve done business with for 15 years has betrayed your trust?
I’ll be posting more about what happened once I stop spinning, but my current answer is,
- I’m mixed and trending upwards.
This acknowledges the reality of the situation without coming across like a victim. It also keeps from putting the questioner in the position of thinking they need to fix things for you.It has a nice dynamic momentum to it.
So I’ll post this and do some things to catalyze my upward trends. I intend to translate this betrayal into one of the biggest opportunities of my career. I’m not there yet, but the indicators are promising. More later. There will be much in it for you.
Email This Post
Related posts which may interest you
- Reader discussion and contest – what if?
- If there is a perfect way for a wife to address a hubby’s infidelity, this is it. Love Actually PowerPhrase
- Reader question: Interview for a job like a “Naked Consultant”
- When the going gets tough, talking like a victim doesn’t help.
- Success Story in Progress#4: when the Paved Road crumbles, other interesting road appear
May 27, 2010Seth Godin’s fantasy iPad ap for meetings nails your meeting needs.
It may not exist yet, but Seth Godin’s fantasy iPad application sure highlights both what is possible and needed for meetings in today’s dynamic new communication environment.
Check it our for Godin’s recommended iPad features, and then ask yourself what you can do to accomplish the same ends while we wait for the new technology.
May 25, 2010PowerPhrase: Glad we got that mistake out of the way. How can we use it to move forward?
Oh, I LOVE being with people who see mistakes as a part of life and the learning process.
Here’s a great phrase someone spoke to me once.
- Glad we got that mistake out of the way. How can we use it to move forward?
No shame, no blame, just momentum.
May 25, 2010Success Story: Dance transforms speaking effectiveness
Which is why I offer NIA DVDs even though my focus is communication.
A reader wrote:
“I learned an interesting twist I didn’t think much about, dancing helps with public speaking. I can recall how uncomfortable body language felt when speaking in front of a group for the first few times. As if I never used my arms or hands before. Dancing helps people get comfortable with their body and accentuate movements.
After I performed at district conference and most attendees participated in a group class afterward, I invited a new speaker to join us for a complimentary private lesson. He is a young, shy guy with terrible posture and body language but he’s a sweetie. It was incredible to watch the results in just one lesson. He looked like a different person when he stood tall with his focus on his core muscles and I paired him up with someone to practice with from our group class and his social interaction was much better. I look forward to him in our group class and seeing how he continues to improve. Some pleasures in life can be so simple….”
I agree with this reader. NIA is a way for you to dynamize your communication through dance...
Email This Post
Related posts which may interest you
- Sometimes storming out is a PowerPhrase: A view of The View
- Reader success story – What to say when the boss spews hate
- Reader Question: help – my message doesn’t make it to my tongue
- Ask Meryl ~ Not my native tongue…keys to changing habits
- Reader Success Story: Trainer applies PowerPhrases when sideswiped at a seminar
May 24, 2010Tips to manage the manager. Interview with @danmulhern Everyday Leaders
When Dan Mulhern invited me on his Every Day Leader show, neither one of us know it would take the direction it did. He kept asking me for phrases to speak to a manager who hasn’t gotten you the information you need to move forward. I kept talking about the conversations to manage our managers before the situation gets to that point. It’s called being proactive.
You can read Dan’s post about it here and listen to the podcast here. I describe the conversations we all need to have to establish great working relationships with our managers in the CD that comes at the back of my SpeakStrong book. It really is about being an everyday leader – taking charge BEFORE there are problems – whether we have the word leader in our title or not.
May 20, 2010Manipulation describes behavior that takes place before establishing trust.
Sometimes we’ve just got to back off and build trust before making requests and placing demands.
Or reestablish trust. Often the people we love most are the ones we need to regain trust with because we access them on such a deep level that minor offenses build defensive walls.
Too often, that’s when we go in for the result rather than back off and heal the harm our unconscious action may have caused.
For more about manipulation, read Lee Beaumont’s article on trust.
May 20, 2010Poison Phrase from movie Avatar: How can we make them collaborate?
In the film Avatar, Colonel Quaritch asks the question,
- How can we make them collaborate?
Collaboration is popular these days. I’m sure Colonel Quartich isn’t the only authoritarian to refer to collaboration so ironically.
Not my idea of collaboration.
May 19, 2010David Maxfield, Crucial Conversations author differentiates between facts and conclusions
David Maxfield wrote an insightful response to angry readers about a previous post he had made regarding global warming. I certainly relate to his dilemma in that any time I use a political example to illustrate a communication point, I find I’ve stepped on a landmine no matter how careful I am in my wording. I respect his treatment of the matter. Particularly for apologizing for referring to:
- conclusions
as
-facts.
It may seem like a small distinction, but if you believe that words matter, you know it’s a huge one.
You can read about it here: Critical Conversations and Controversy and get a bonus success story about a man who got a $30K refund on a new home for asking gracefully. Great stuff.
